Particles: 1 Mesh + size by life?

I feel stupid right now, I’m trying to get a 1 mesh ball to live for at least 4 seconds, but also fade in & grow at the start, wait at least a second, and then shrink & fade out at the end.
I can’t for the life of me figure it out, I can do it with sprites!
I’ve tried doing constant curves in Lifetime, Size by Life, Size Scale at different times, but it disregards any points past the first two.
I can change the alpha of the material but the mesh ball just goes dark.

It’s tricky because the mesh can’t die… I think that’s what’s messing up the Lifetime modules.
But I’m not sure of a way round it…

Help is appreciated, thanks!