What Do You Think of My Game Introduction?

I’m thinking of making a game using Unreal Engine 4 that will be released whenever I finish it and I was wondering what you think of the start of it. Opinions on things to add to flesh out the story or things to change are appreciated. Okay, so here goes…

Story of my Game

Combat tutorial of the game: The Roman father sat in a prison cell in the dungeons of a Roman arena before he was sent to fight in the arena in a nearby Roman settlement. He battles other gladiators as well as Roman soldiers, people on chariots, archers with arrows tipped with fire as well as tigers before leaving the arena as the victor of that battle. He promises to himself that he will do whatever it takes to make things right.

Beginning

Sometime during the evening of the Ides of March, a festival in Rome where the sacrificing of a lamb is said to bring great wealth to the citizens of Rome, is held. The son of a well-known Roman Centurion, who is fighting in the continuous war against the Barbarians far away in the forests away from the walls of Rome, is tending to a young elephant after arriving at the festival by way of a winding path from his house to the main square. The elephant was considered a symbol of great wealth to the emperor of Rome, was one of Caesar’s most prized animals.

As the boy is tending to the animal, onlookers are gazing on the animal. A boy similar in looks comes over to the boy and stabs the elephant to death, remaining out of sight of the onlookers. The boy who was tending to the elephant was shocked by what happened. His small knife which he used to clean the elephant was stained and some of the onlookers realized what had happened and blamed the boy for the death of the elephant. As the boy was running away from the scene, Roman guards chased him through the marketplace but they lost sight of him sometime during the case. The boy ran as fast as he could, dodging through the large crowds that were confused by the commotion in the square and by the boy running right through them, all the way back to his house in the forest. He rushed inside, avoiding the gaze of his mother who was surprised at the early return of her son. Before the mother was able to find out what happened to his son, there were multiple knocks on the door and Roman guards rushed into the house with the intent to arrest the mother’s son. Scared and attempting to protect the life of her son, the mother grabs a nearby kitchen knife and stabs the chest of one of the Roman officer’s. The boy, realizing what happened, rushes out to try and protect his mother from harm swinging a short sword he picked up in his bedroom, but although the boy cut down one of the guards one of the other ones quickly and forcefully disarmed him. Brushing the mother aside, they dragged the boy screaming to his mother for help but the mother just sat and wept.

News of what had happened at the house reached the father by word of one of the Roman officers that interrupted him. The father was in the middle of planning to attack the Barbarians that had pinned themselves down a short ways into the forest. The messenger, carrying a rolled parchment telling of what had happened, was tired from the long journey. The father was furious by what had happened back in Rome but he was unable to leave immediately as there was a small attack by a group of Barbarians. After the Romans killed all of the Barbarians, he left immediately for Rome in search of his wife and son.

Meanwhile at one of the Roman squares, the area had been repurposed into a crematory and the mother and son were forced to their knees by other Roman guards in front of the crowd of onlookers. The corpse of the elephant burned in a great fire as the Roman senator decided what was to happen to the family. He expressed his deepest regrets of what had happened during the festival, and was especially shocked of who were responsible. The mother’s son was ordered to be locked up in the prison of Syracuse far away from Rome and he announced that the victor of the upcoming gladiatorial games was to be rewarded with the Rudis after the winner kills the boy for all the trouble that was caused during the festival.The mother was frightened of what might happen to her, but although she struggled to run away guards stopped her. Meanwhile a young girl in the middle of the crowd, hearing of what was to happen to the boy, quickly left the square.*


I haven’t thought of any names for any of the characters and don’t have an exact idea of what they might look like and stuff. My game is gonna be a sort of third-person sword fighting/stealth game between two different characters you control throughout the game.


I’m not worrying about the naming of the game or any of the characters at this present time. At the moment I am focusing on fleshing out my demo area, learning Unreal Engine 4 in the process, and then working on developing character models, movement animations, and then the combat in the game which will take a long time. In terms of the sort of gameplay I am taking notes from:

Infinity Blade (weapon animations)
The Last of Us (character movement)
Shadow of Rome (setting of the game - NOT the story)
Ryse: Son of Rome (what I am not going to do: faults in the combat, the awkward movement, QTE’s etc).
FEAR (The AI in that game is very smart and, although FEAR is an FPS, I will try and incorporate AI behaviour into my game)
Naughty Dog games in general: Learning from the best is the best way to go.
The Order: 1886 - Yes, this game. I will be trying to match the detail of the character models in this game. Everything else from this game are stuff that is of little relevance to the game I am making.

This is my own personal project, and this is going to be a fully fledged out game once I’m done with it that will probably end up being equivalent to Shadow of Rome’s length once I’m done (30-40 hours). This is not a school project as a sort of assignment but this is going to be a project that will probably take many years to finish. As for what will happen in the story, they are just thoughts that I have and I have not really started working on the actual story. I am in the middle of learning Unreal Engine 4 and growing out my demo section as I go along. The demo section will very likely end up being an area in the actual game, probably one of the first arenas.

If you are interested in seeing progress I have made on the game let me know.

By the way, if anyone would like to help me develop this game let me know. This will be more than just an average solo/indie project.

Yes that’s the spirit! Too many games are released unfinished these days.

As a gamer I have to say I hate it when games start out with long intro like this that seem to drag on and on. Especially for a character the players don’t care, yet.

It is my own preference for games to jump right into action and build that connection with main character before starting this sort of long narrative. Think Uncharted. You could start out with the boy sent out to find wild elephants and do a little combat intro while he fights through wolves and other wild life.

Anyway, too many explanation and sub plot right at the beginning. Keep it simple, if you want to tell the story about the boy, then tell just the boy. Every thing else should be added along the way to slowly add depth and back story. Not all at the beginning like this.

Just my 2c :slight_smile:

I might do something like Uncharted 2 where it starts right with the action and then skips back to the very beginning of the game. I was going to think of doing this by starting with the demo area I’m working on. What do you think of everything?

I’m already well underway with the game. I’ve almost finished designing the layout of what will be probably the demo area.

Worry about the demo area much later.

Don’t worry about all that story. It is important to have an outline of where you want it to go as a framework of a large project, but by attempting to adhere too heavily to the story framework from the outset all you’ll do is needless increase complexity. Instead allow the game to evolve organically as a result of your work, skill limitations, and team collaboration.

I’m making the game by myself. I’m not worrying about the story but am focusing on making the basic mechanics of the game, doing this by first designing a demo area that I can go through. Does that make sense?

“I’m not worrying about the story but am focusing on making the basic mechanics of the game,” What? I actually think the story is pretty cool. Yes, you have to get your game mechanics down (Hallelujah Blueprints) but a compelling story is what’s going to drag me in. Creating a crisp, short animation sequence for your beginning will teach you quite a bit about game making, I think. And, Dude, come on, I’m dying to know about the young girl that left the square. Who is she? How does she fit in? I want to turn the page, but there are no pages. That’s good storytelling. Keep plugging away.

What I meant by what I said is that I am more focused on building out a test level where I can test game mechanics that will be in the game, before I actually start to work on the actual game. The test level will very likely end up being either a section in the game or even part of a demo. I don’t know how to get the game mechanics I want up and running as I don’t even know how to model characters and rig animations for them, something that some tutorial online or these forums might help with (in discussion in a different thread).

I’m pretty confident that the introductory part of the story doesn’t need to be changed, although I’m up to change parts of it if anyone has any good ideas.

What do you mean by create a crisp, short animation sequence for the beginning? Do you mean a cutscene made in Matinee?

The girl in the square becomes one of the two central main characters that is going to be in my game. She’ll basically go around Rome trying to find information about the true murderer, what is to happen to the mother and boy, and how the Gladiatorial Games will pan out. I was thinking that she bumps into the father early in the game where they then work together to try and save the father’s wife and his/her son who is locked up in the prison. She’ll be the sort of stealth-character who plans out her moves, in contrast to the other main character where the father (who is the other main character) of the boy will be the sort of head rushing in person that just gets things done.

I rewrote how I was intending to do my opening several times over the course of development and still have not actually put it together. This is because as I worked on developing the core mechanics, I found that things deviated from my original design decisions whether due to my programming limitations or as a result of organic shifts in the core engagement.

I just feel that both from my experience and all I have read & watched regarding game development that you shouldn’t focus more than a bare skeleton on such early things which substantially are minor portions in the overall development cycle that are dependent upon other systems.

So by the core mechanics you mean stuff like character rigging, programming movement mechanics and combat etc.?

Would the introductory section of a game be considered something that is part of the bare skeleton?

The programming that defines how everything operates. Do you think including lock picking initially is a great idea? YES! But then maybe you work on it and find that lock picking mini games actually disrupt the flow of the game causing your core engagement to suffer. If you’ve already designed an introductory level which includes lock picking mechanics then you’re either forced to keep it around or redo everything you’ve already done.

Likewise maybe you find upon development that you were thinking you’d be focusing heavily on a certain type of shooting, certain locals, or more emphasis on item collection yet found that as you developed the product the way you were building it was actually focusing more on other things or entirely new things you hadn’t even thought of at your initial design document. The first 15 minutes of gameplay is the most organic period for informing the player of mechanics. You could choose to just give them a big wall of text with button prompts or you can find ways to meld the story and mechanics fluidly so that the player doesn’t feel as if their interactions are “game-y.”

If you put too much emphasis on the early portion of your game prior to developing the larger aspects of it then you’ll be forcing yourself either into major redoes or corners to justifying negative interactions.

Focus on having a core idea. The fact you know you want an NPC to assist in is important and one of those core ideas. Flesh out in what ways that NPC is going to assist the players and also what ways it won’t. See how it will tie into other systems and make for a more engaging experience. When you have all of these ideas down then work on those. Get the meat of the product done and worry about the intro when you concretely know what you’re introducing.

Thanks for the help :slight_smile:

I’ll start working on the basic mechanics soon and after I have everything I need working properly then I’ll press onto the actual story. In terms of the basic mechanics, what software do I need to design and rig a character model? I know that in UE4 you can do all the animating for it and then program collision parameters and stuff for different events. I have a 3 year license of 3DS Max 2015 (which I have no idea how to use), and also Sculptris Alpha 6.

“What do you mean by create a crisp, short animation sequence for the beginning? Do you mean a cutscene made in Matinee?” I mean something short, to the point, sets the momentum. I guess I agree with Panupat Chong, who posted after your initial post. You could certainly put together scenes in Matinee. Plus you’ve got all the tools you’ll need to create with; Max and Sculptris. I don’t want to side-track you, I agree with everything is saying also. I think you have a cool idea and a very cool opening scene.

Don’t make overly long cutscenes or at least make them skippable. More care you should give to making good gameplay. Gameplay is everything - if it sucks, your game sucks as well, even if it has best story in the world. Just look at what happened to The (do not) Order 1886. If gameplay is solid, people will forgive the story. Look at classics like Super Mario Bros, Castlevania, etc. - those had no story whatsoever in the game. Granted, it was more due to the limitation of the NES, but it didn’t stop those games from being fun. Why? Gameplay.

My first priority for my project is gradually making the best gameplay mechanics I can and then integrating that into the actual game and then working on the story. I don’t think The Order had a good story nor good gameplay, and I believe that all three systems (gameplay/story/graphics - in that order) need to tie together well to make a great game. That’s partly why I was working on a sort of demo level first, so that I could work on the gameplay mechanics before using them to enhance my game. Would the ability to skip cutscenes be done through a sort of button command done in blueprint? Like, you press Enter and the blueprint is coded so that when you press Enter the cutscene skips?

If anyone would like to see pictures of my project and how it’s going feel free to let me know and give feedback on what to improve :slight_smile:

I happen to agree with Panupat Chong & on the subject.

Your project sounds very ambitious and my advice to you would be to get a general idea of what each act of the games story will entail, work out an introduction to your game world and characters which gets you emotionally involved in this child’s life through perhaps running errands prior to the festival as Panupat Chong suggested and perhaps a confrontation with some boys the same age as the child you play, who say bully you since you’re father is not around or something similar to establish a connection between the disconnect with the child and his father.

You should also look at creating a rough tension chart for each of the beats of your games story.

Example:

pacing_01_star_wars.gif&stc=1

Source: http://www.gamasutra.com/view/feature/4032/beyond_pacing_games_arent_.php?print=1

Please note you’re only looking to create a rough roadmap and you don’t want to get into too much detail at this stage as things change A LOT in games development. I would highly recommend taking a look at Blake Snyder’s Save The Cat Beats Sheet examples from the film industry.

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How you should consider to structure your games story:

Set-up – Expand on the “before” snapshot. Present the main character’s world as it is, and what is missing in their life.

Theme Stated (happens during the Set-up) – What your story is about; the message, the truth. Usually, it is spoken to the main character or in their presence, but they don’t understand the truth…not until they have some personal experience and context to support it.

Catalyst – The moment where life as it is changes. It is the telegram, the act of catching your loved-one cheating, allowing a monster onboard the ship, meeting the true love of your life, etc. The “before” world is no more, change is underway.

Debate – But change is scary and for a moment, or a brief number of moments, the main character doubts the journey they must take. Can I face this challenge? Do I have what it takes? Should I go at all? It is the last chance for the hero to chicken out.

Break Into Two (Choosing Act Two) – The main character makes a choice and the journey begins. We leave the “Thesis” world and enter the upside-down, opposite world of Act Two.

B Story – This is when there’s a discussion about the Theme – the nugget of truth. Usually, this discussion is between the main character and the love interest. So, the B Story is usually called the “love story”.

The Promise of the Premise – This is the fun part of the story. This is when Craig Thompson’s relationship with Raina blooms, when Indiana Jones tries to beat the Nazis to the Lost Ark, when the detective finds the most clues and dodges the most bullets. This is when the main character explores the new world and the audience is entertained by the premise they have been promised.

Midpoint – Dependent upon the story, this moment is when everything is “great” or everything is “awful”. The main character either gets everything they think they want (“great”) or doesn’t get what they think they want at all (“awful”). But not everything we think we want is what we actually need in the end.

Bad Guys Close In – Doubt, jealousy, fear, foes both physical and emotional regroup to defeat the main character’s goal, and the main character’s “great”/“awful” situation disintegrates.

All is Lost – The opposite moment from the Midpoint: “awful”/“great”. The moment that the main character realizes they’ve lost everything they gained, or everything they now have has no meaning. The initial goal now looks even more impossible than before. And here, something or someone dies. It can be physical or emotional, but the death of something old makes way for something new to be born.

Dark Night of the Soul – The main character hits bottom, and wallows in hopelessness. The Why hast thou forsaken me, Lord? moment. Mourning the loss of what has “died” – the dream, the goal, the mentor character, the love of your life, etc. But, you must fall completely before you can pick yourself back up and try again.

Break Into Three (Choosing Act Three) – Thanks to a fresh idea, new inspiration, or last-minute Thematic advice from the B Story (usually the love interest), the main character chooses to try again.

Finale – This time around, the main character incorporates the Theme – the nugget of truth that now makes sense to them – into their fight for the goal because they have experience from the A Story and context from the B Story. Act Three is about Synthesis!

Final Image – opposite of Opening Image, proving, visually, that a change has occurred within the character.

**THE END

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After that is done you should pick a spot about 10% to 30% into your game as the prime candidate for prototyping your showcase demo, as the player should by now have unlocked a majority of the game mechanics included in the game and would be the most beneficial place to test mechanics, etc.

This of course depends on who you play as after the child has been put in jail? the witness and the father if I stand corrected?

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BONUS :smiley:

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I would HIGHLY RECOMMEND you go through and watch the entire Rome TV series (2 seasons), which presented a very grounded take on Rome’s middle to upper class living conditions, culture, beliefs, political and social structure to name a few :wink:

Before there was Game of Thrones, there was ROME! the sets are marvellous are they not?

I was going to upload 2 examples of Beat Sheets but this forum’s attachment limit is 19.5 KB for PDF file types…

So here they are via Dropbox links:

FYI each of these beat sheets obviously completely spoil both of the moves above, so keep that in mind if you haven’t seen the movies yet and wish to do so (HTTYD FTW:o)

I can drop my thought on this as I was once like you. I have to agree the “idea” does sound abit ambitious but this is where you can prove everyone wrong. If you believe in your own idea then that is enough.
Your approach is abit amateurish at best. I know this because I went down the same path. I thought too big too fast and I saw myself at the finish line before I even started. I recommend you approach this in stages. I am developing a game as well butI am now taking my time having learned from my previous game dev.

Stage 1 - General idea of the overall game. (you’ve done this already)
Stage 2 - Art and Concept Art (get as many examples as you can and put them in a file word doc)(I use wordpress for this)
Stage 3 - At this stage you will use your art and story to attract talent.
Stage 4 - Crew assessment and development of mechanics and look and feel.
Stage 5 - General world/level layout. (this is important because you do not include textures or finished meshes. Layout the level/world and make sure that your character(s) flow)
Stage 6 - Resources and model archives.
Stage 7 - Full out development, Gui, animation, music/fx, lights, textures, etc…
Testing and so on…