Ok I made a whole new game, it seems the third person bp was corrupted or something (it did have a crash once and had to replace files with the new save so I assume this is why). Copied everything and then I was getting 3 listed of x y z. One would say 1x 1y 1z and the others 0x 0y 0z. To fix this I made two animation bps and made my male and female separate, but they could share the same custom event in fact there anim bp are the same just with a different name. Then between the third person reference and get anim instance I put get skeletal mesh male and did the same with female. Then taken what you shared and added a sequence so it can trigger two version so when I adjust the scale it will affect both even if I switch the gender it will keep the scale.
