ah now i understand your problem much better !
so if both components you want to attach to each other are in different actors - that is fine, you can attach component of actor with component of actor - that is not ur problem i think. is the attachment working in ur simplified case (picture u show with the cylinder red on the board object green)?
it seems you are using some specific clothing simulation - and here i am not the expert. The clothing is often a mesh with a can be complex mesh or material function. In that way if the clothing is moving by the wind or else - the question is: what kind of component is your clothing? can you provide some pictures or more info about that?